Another great mom?

I often wonder about all the things that make one a great mom.

A friend of mine picks out matching clothes for her son, goes out of her way to make and feed all meals…and cuts all fruit into small perfect shapes. She also uses a spoon to feed fruit pouches…. I always tell her she is a great mom… interestingly, I wonder if my children will ever think me a great mom… or if her son will think that of her…

You see, just because you do your best doesn’t mean the person you do it for sees this… Very often, as a child…. It’s rare to think of your parents in any other light as other than the simple fact that they simply are…. Your parents. I know that’s how I saw mine for the longest time.

I now bear the burden of knowledge.

I now know what it means to be on the other end of it…. Mom.

I look at the world and see all the ways it can be cruel to my child….

I also get to double check closed doors, seatbelts…. And wonder about stair cases without rails…

I also rethink peas on a plate….. to be fair… I never wondered about these before.

Suddenly here we are.

You and I …

They say you can not spoil your child by loving them…

The kindest most grounded person I know was also the most loved child I ever knew….

And yet here I am ….

Kissing my child too much over the smallest most random things…. Like when she puts her shoes on by herself for the first time…

She will not remember these small things…. But I will and that is okay…

To love someone else this much…

This selflessly…

Yes, parenting is a burden…

Probably the hardest and heaviest of all….

It’s also a luxury….

One I’m honored I got to afford….